Monday, November 23, 2009

wtf happened on saturday night

Okay, you all hate me, im a fuckwit, i did the most hurtful thing in the world, but i am trying to redeem myself and try to understand that please.

I called mboy recently on sunday and i explained it all to him over the phone, heart to heart, and he understands. We fixed things, i still love him and he still loves me and he knows i did NOT send that text with a smiley face. He was incredibly hurt on saturday night/sunday morning and i knew he was, but the family wouldnt let me call him, chat with him, msn him or do ANYTHING to contact him whatsoever and i was the only guy who could change how he felt on that night. He needed to know that i loved him, that i was going through a lot of shit at that point from the family and counsellor. We spent hours at that appointment with a counsellor blasting and labelling me as a 'pedophile' or 'predator' and he called me it so much that i started to believe it...
UPDATE
Okay now things are 10x difficult with dad taking my phone away, but i dont care i will keep contact with mboy somehow ;)
Continuing on with the story (from internet cafe)...
So yeah, things are fucked up with the counsellor calling me all this crap, and telling me stories about people going to jail for it, and not stopping with it until im seriously down and it looks like im breaking up with mboy to him and my mum =/
He even went to the point of telling my mum to check with the police whether mboy was who he says he is :O but iv trusted mboy all along :P
Okay so, when he was satisfied and knew i had been through enough, we paid him $100 for his bullcrap and i was taken home. There i was forced to do a break-up final text with mboy, with mum and my stupid brother watching. A series of texts followed, and then they took my frigin phone away. We went to dinner and then we got back and my brother was in shock coz he had my phone and saw all these really saddening texts coming from mboy. I was as low as you can go at that point, i never wanted to hurt mboy. I yelled and screamed for msn or something just so i could talk to mboy, but noooo im not allowed the internet or my phone.
My silly brother sent in a text to mboy with SOME of my words, but he added in smileys and shit and then sent it, that was the killing blow that REALLY hurt mboy. I was far from happy about the whole thing, i was PISSED OFF and so down all night but mboy thought i was cheerful/content about the whole thing and i dont blame him because thats the way the texts seemed :(. A very disturbing call from my brother to mboy came and i just had to grab that phone and talk to mboy, i hear mboys sad replies and knew id fucked things up and hurt him, i had my brother and mum watching and i was just so screwed up i said stupid things.
Forgive me mboy, i never meant to hurt you like this.
The next day, there were a series of texts and eventually a call and we talked things through and i apologised as best i could. There was still plenty of love between us and we were both hurting by not talking to each other or being with each other, we had to keep it going. And now things move forward....
And thats about it. Thx for hearing my side of the story.

16 comments:

  1. I don't hate you ... and it has to be hell going threw this ... knew there was more to this ... man get away as soon as you can... especially from so called professional. There is nothing wrong with you. Love Just

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  2. Nope don't hate you and I didn't think you were saying what you did b/c you wanted to and I had a feeling it must have been your parents b/c NO ONE can go from love to hate in such a short time.

    so no apologies to me at least

    Besides in the end it doesn't matter what everyone else here or where you are thinks of your relationship with Mirrorboy

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  3. nah man i dont hate you n your not a fuckwit...n i'm sorry that your folks have reacted the way they have it must be hell
    i thought that might have been what happened

    n w/e you do dont believe their shit...your not a pedophile or predator especially since that only applies if mboy was 15 or under which he isnt

    praying that it all works out for you n mboy man

    hugs
    Peace:)

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  4. I don't hate you one bit, boy.

    :-D

    I hope you read all of the comments on Mboy's post 'cause I and many others said it sounded like you were being forced by your family to do what you did. Though I hate what they're doing to you, I'm very happy that I was right and I wish you and Mboy all the happiness in the world.

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  5. It's not going to be easy for you to live with your parents' opposition. But life is long and you can expect to have plenty of time to develop your relationship.

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  6. I don't hate you BitBoy.

    In fact, I understand how you feel. My parents found a LGBT advice website in the computer history. Tried to turn me straight. They still think I am.
    When they found that, every male friend I had instantly became suspect. It wasn't nice.

    Be true to yourself. There's only one person in this world you have to answer to. That person is you.

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  7. They are convinced because of all the devastation to mboy on that night that we have broken up, which is a good thing for them to think because it makes my escape to see mboy in a week that much easier. Thankyou guys for sticking up for me and mboy.

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  8. omg! what kind of counselor is that? do they have a degree? are they certified from all the proper professional organizations? I would check on that if I were you.

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  9. i'll post it here, dad saw my blog address in the internet history, has had a look and has now taken my phone lol no matter what he is not stopping me contacting mboy, i love him too much. Even without internet, a phone or any other means of contact, im sticking with mboy through thick and thin. Nobody is getting me out of this ;)

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  10. I should send you super raunchy texts then. :P

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  11. BitBoy!

    Your parents sound quite extreme! You really need to break away from them. Parents support and love their children, they shouldn't try to control them. Move out if you can!!

    The counselor you're seeing should have their license revoked. What kind of counselor insults their patient?! WTF!

    You and Mirrorboy are both teens, correct? So because you're a year or two older that makes you a predator? Huh!?!

    It truly makes very little sense to me.

    You need to be around a better support group than the one you're currently associating with. Family should help you, NOT hurt you!

    Good luck, BitBoy!!

    -Dean

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  12. bitboy

    this world sucks at times and its too bad your parents are so screwed up

    take care and be safe

    bob

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  13. N hate here, just as long as you mean what you feel and mboy the same you will get through it. There is always internet cafe's
    Good luck

    Be Safe

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